Tuesday, June 24, 2014

Tired on the Wrong Side of the Bed.

Ask my stepson. I'm not letting him eat Skittles for lunch, making him put his wet towels in the washer, and forcing him to read. I'm No.Fun.

There is no Weekend Report because there really is nothing to report. All the boys were sick (boys = husband included) so I put on my Wonder Woman cape** and went to work. 
I'm going to pat my own damn back for a minute because sometimes it doesn't get patted. That's probably b/c I'm a huge blob of pregnant hobbitness right now and the only pat on the back I get is from my 3 year old when he interrupts me on the potty and says, Good job Mommy!!

And don't disagree with me. My Instagram pic was cropped and covered. Me in a maternity suit is awful. I'm going to make my family sign a photography disclosure form for the beach that they cannot instagram/hashtag/facebook/tweet any pictures of me without my direct approval or some amazing photoshop skills. FAT HOBBIT.

How I want to look/feel while Pregnant:

How I look/feel while pregnant:

Last week I got in 30 minutes of cardio every day and stuck to my most basic (not exactly clean eating) but protein shake in the morning, toasted turkey with reduced fat swiss sandwich on whole wheat, and healthy dinners regimen during M-Th. But Friday....oh Friday. Someone kept me up hacking up a lung all night and 2 bathroom breaks for peanut so I ate McDonalds. 
And then it just went downhill............I knew I had to be up late Friday night so I bought Raisinets, Pretzel Pizza Combos, and a Twix to snack on. Klassy.
Sweet Jesus I would eat all of this.

I worked until Midnight (2nd or 3rd Friday in a row) Friday night and then up at 6am for our "Yard Sale". HA! We only made $38 which I spent quickly taking the two boys to get haircuts. Then lunch, then naps. Then activities in the yard/running errands/picking out carpet for upstairs. Then bed.

Then all again Sunday. The doctor said the little guys only had colds and I knew I needed to get a psycho 3 year old to nap so we went to the pool Sunday. He didn't have a fever, and wasn't snotty so don't judge. Then naps. Then more errands, then house cleaning. Then dinner for me and the boys then some work. then bed.

I know this isn't anything super awesome to blog about. You moms with 2+ kids do it ALL the time. And probably feed your kids organic dinners. Off Non-BPA plates. While breastfeeding. I cannot even imagine 3 little ones. I just can't. I don't think I meet the height requirement to handle that. But this heat + pregnancy + sick husband and I'm POOPED. I'm also up most nights from 8-11 working to get in extra hours before maternity leave. But I am thankful one of these kids is 12 and can help out. I know, I hear you laughing. How is she going to handle two!? I've thought the exact same thing. WINE. That is how I will handle two.

So all that said and I really want a Diet Coke. 

With Bourbon. (Or Tennessee Whiskey)
But I'm trying to cut back since M swears that is why my son is short. Um.....have you seen pictures of my family? He obviously got his genes from us and I hate to tell you this but it wasn't the caffeine. It was the Braselman genes. *Cut back on caffeine...I'm not drinking bourbon while pregnant. Just maybe a sip. Once a month. 

So no awesome post today. I have some tear-outs I'll try to post by this afternoon. I DID however match all my socks yesterday and put away t-shirts that i can't fit in...and in this process found ALL my sorority t-shirts. What do you guys do with those? Keep? Toss? 
I hate to toss them....won't they be SOOO badass for my daughter to wear when she goes to school...you know....in 2032? GULP.

**I am by no means a Super Mom. I consider not ordering Pizza Hut and buying a Pizza from Trader Joe's, cutting up some bananas, and sitting at the table with the two younger boys for dinner major success in my book. 

PS-And I'm STILL craving cake. Damn you Instagram and your cake pictures. I have yellow box cake in my pantry and only the image of my hobbit ass in the pool bathroom mirror is keeping me from eating all of it.

xo and thanks for letting me bitch,


  1. You are hilarious. And I could eat the entire snack pic and the cake and I'm not preggo. I hope everyone is feeling better. You deserve a pat on the back and a great massage too!